Apparently, I have been living under a rock. But I am catching up now and have been watching a couple of episodes of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt for the past few days. I had not heard of it until seeing the trailer on Margaret's blog.
I was pleased to be staying current with Last Tango in Halifax but I now am seriously considering deferring that til another time. August is prime sink into a depression time for me and, let me tell you, British dramas don't have anything to offer in the way of lightening the mood.
This August marks the second anniversary of Mike's passing, but August has always been a trigger so it is not just that. At least I know it will pass and that I should exercise extra vigilance around machinery and such. I get extremely accident prone when I am depressed.
I have been reading The Awakened Introvert: Practical Mindfulness Skills to Help You Maximize Your Strengths & Thrive in a Loud & Crazy World by Arnie Kozak.
I was pleased to be staying current with Last Tango in Halifax but I now am seriously considering deferring that til another time. August is prime sink into a depression time for me and, let me tell you, British dramas don't have anything to offer in the way of lightening the mood.
This August marks the second anniversary of Mike's passing, but August has always been a trigger so it is not just that. At least I know it will pass and that I should exercise extra vigilance around machinery and such. I get extremely accident prone when I am depressed.
I have been reading The Awakened Introvert: Practical Mindfulness Skills to Help You Maximize Your Strengths & Thrive in a Loud & Crazy World by Arnie Kozak.
It isn't that this book is filled with startling new revelations for me, but it certainly is filled with needed reminders of what I need to be practicing, especially now. I think I will need to read this every August for the rest of my life.
I have been dithering about my house situation. I really need less house and yard to take care of, but I could not seem to make a strong move in that direction even after talking to the real estate people. My son, the original poster child for indecision, even said I need to kick him out and move on. That woke me up a little, but the big thing was stripping the wallpaper. It is done now. I will have to find a painter still, but taking things off the wall really got me thinking--does this spark joy? Do I want to take this to a new, smaller place?
I will be taking some trips to Habitat for Humanity Restore with donations--feeling some space open up around me as I go. I am (to some) disturbingly unsentimental about stuff. I really do work on the practical/use it or sparks joy principles.
Well now I have two rooms in kind of a mess--the living/dining room and the office where I have stored stuff from the living room.
I am off to clear some space.
My 'down' month has always been February, and I understand how you feel. I'm dreading all the 'use it or chuck it' routine I have in store. How did I ever accumulate so much? I hope my kids want a lot of it, but I know it may not happen. Good luck with your decluttering.
ReplyDeleteWow, Olga - great legs. Thinking of you so much this month.....
ReplyDeleteAww Olga, Anniversaries are hard. Be extra good to you
ReplyDeleteMy un-down month is April. All the rest of them suck...too hot or too cold...or the damned cold and snow is coming.
ReplyDeleteAugust will be tough month for you Olga. Take good care of yourself and be on the guard for accidents.
You don't agree with T.S. Eliot's "Wasteland"?
DeleteAPRIL is the cruellest month, breeding
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing
Memory and desire, stirring
Dull roots with spring rain.
:: extra hugs for you ::
ReplyDeleteSorry that this month is tough for you - I hope the depression doesn't hit you hard.
ReplyDeleteDe-cluttering is such a chore but at least when it is done it feels good. I don't do it often enough.
Have a great week!
I can't believe it's 2 years that Mike is gone. It must be very hard missing him. Sounds like you are making a big decidion about the house - maybe... Do you think you'd get a smaller place in VT? I feel relief that we sold the Denver house. Getting a house ready to sell is a lot of work, and it's also nervewracking. I'm happy to only have one house to maintain now.
ReplyDeleteI do want a place in VT for as long as I can make the trip back and forth...or until my grand kids are grown.
DeleteIt doesn't help to know August is bad. Even getting a running start on it doesn't help much. Hopefully the month with its triggers will pass quickly for you.
ReplyDeleteI especially want to declutter in April when we get home from living in 620 square feet for the winter. It's so easy with a minimum of stuff. My husband is a saver, though, so I look forward to the time when we'll move permanently into something smaller. That will force the issue. But the amount of work involved is discouraging even to just think about.
It also doesn't help that August is so darn hot and humid. I'm so sorry, Olga. It's hard to believe it's been two years. I can still remember it. I'm sending you a cyber hug from across the ocean.
ReplyDeleteWe lost our husbands at almost the same time. Ron dies in July and your Mike in August, two years ago. Hard to believe. Still hard to adapt.
ReplyDeleteYes, I remember. My thoughts are with our little group.
DeleteThank- you, friends, for the good wishes.
ReplyDeleteIt's important to reflect on one's living situation. With hubby confronting cancer, we've been examining it. I do outside chores, anyway. I don't have any friends nearby, but I don't need that. Interesting time of your life, isn't it?! All the best.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you, Olga. Take care!
ReplyDeleteIt really doesn't seem like it has been 2 years. I'm sending you some extra energy to keep you from falling down and breaking anything! If you want a funny comedy to help take your mind off life and to fill up a 30 minute spot try Odd Mom Out. Jenna just got us started on it. Isn't for everyone but it does make me laugh!
ReplyDeleteI'm guessing that August will always be difficult for you, Olga. But keeping busy and doing things that are up-lifting might help (maybe being around people who make you laugh?) "Last Tango in Halifax" is a series I watch also, but it can be a bit depressing (my comment to DH is that 'these people talk too much'... seems to constantly get them in trouble).
ReplyDeleteI too was stunned that it has been two years. I am sure the pain doesn't feel less even with time. Thoughts and hugs coming your way.
ReplyDeleteDecisions the older we get are harder. Know you will do what will make you more comfortable and happy.