Thursday, August 19, 2010

I'll Get It

It’s certainly nothing new to complain about telemarketers. I try to hang up if there is that moments hesitation before the call really starts, but that doesn’t always work. It always a bad sign when the caller can’t seem to get your name quite right. If it’s out and out wrong--Herbert instead of Hebert--I just say, “No this isn’t the Herbert residence. You must have the wrong number,” and then hang up. If the caller asks for Mike, I say,”Just a minute and I’ll see,” then leave the phone off the hook while I go do something else until the phone starts buzzing. Sometimes I’ll interrupt the spiel with a “just not interested,” and a hang up. Sometimes they are really hard to interrupt and they are well trained not hear the words, “No, thank-you.”

My son once told me he would sometimes act interested and keep callers on the line for quite some time before blowing them off. At least that way he felt he was keeping the next person from being annoyed at dinnertime. I also once read a suggestion of keeping a recording of babies crying, children tantruming, or dogs barking handy so that you could flip it on and annoy the telemarketers back. I thought it was clever, but I never tried it.

Lately, I have noticed a disconcerting trend. have you noticed this as well--telemarketers that start chatting you up like they’re your long lost best friend from college or something. “Hi, how are you?” “How’s the weather up there?” “Are you having a chance to enjoy this fine summer?” “Did you catch that episode of America’s Got Talent last night?” Really, just tell me what you want me to buy, do, or donate so I can say “No, thanks,” and get off the phone already.

It’s a good thing we are on the DO NOT CALL LIST.


  1. Bob tells all telemarketers that he's involved in a bitter divorce. That shuts them up. They move on quickly.

    He also keeps the junk mail and switches the advertising around among the post paid return envelopes and mails them back.


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