Friday, November 7, 2014

Aging, Schmaging

In a recent post, gigi-hawaii, wrote about aging in place.  On my walk later that very same day, I passed a nearby house with this sign in front of it:

The number of cars in the drive indicated that there was a small party going on.  I remember when this woman. who still lives this house that she and her husband built right next to the farm they once worked, celebrated birthday #100 last year.  She was written up in the paper and there was a huge community party at the Catholic church.  She is still going strong--aging in place.

It occurred to me that my own mother would have been 101 this past September had she lived.  My mother developed dementia and spent the last few years of her life in a nursing home.  I suppose by definition she was aging out of place.  Dementia is such a strange condition--aging and regressing to infancy all at the same time.

To add to the convergence here, the drain pipe for the kitchen sink sprang a leak. Another little nudge to my thinking about aging in place--definitely not this place.  Unless a good looking plumber comes knocking on the door and wants to marry me, I think I am going to let this house age in its place while I go find another place for myself.  That is a project I will think about next summer.

15 comments:

  1. Would you consider living in Fla full time or just a new Vt. house? I always say if a good mechanic or plumber is all ready married, see if he is up for adoption.
    Congrats to that lady in her 101 year.

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  2. My mother, who also has dementia, lives in a nursing home, where she's cared for 24/7. We visit her every day, but she doesn't know we're there half the time. If my husband goes first, I'd want to be in a setting where I'd be cared for. There's no way I'd be able to "age in place" in this house! If I win the lottery, I'll get a house that's accessible, plus I'll have hundreds of minions!

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  3. My mother also had dementia when she died. It is a very cruel and painful experience.

    Hmmmm! The future looks so rosy, does it not?

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  4. I would like to live to age 100 if I could be at home and have my mental faculties. Otherwise pull the cord.

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  5. Dementia is a deal breaker, because with that type of illness, one cannot even fry an egg.

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    1. Now without burning the house down in the process. I know from experience.

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  6. Aging in place at 101 ... now that's a milestone! As for dementia, I hope it doesn't come knocking on our door.

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  7. I'm not sure what happened to my comment so I'll try again...hopefully it doesn't show up twice.

    How wonderful to reach 101 and still be at home. My Dad always hoped to reach 100, but sadly passed away 3 weeks after his 98th birthday. Still, he had a long and productive life, and more time than most.

    When do you head south again? Hopefully before the snow flies!

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  8. I hope we can still be in this same place when I hit 100 and that I can be healthy and aware. Losing your mind must be very frustrating and I don't want to put me or the people around me though that -- like I have a choice!

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  9. I understand completely about not wanting to maintain the house on your own. The thousand things that Husband does . . . I don't even know what they ARE . . . but I know I wouldn't have the means to keep things running on my own.

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  10. As the daughter of one who is aging in place, I can say that the challenge of making that happen is overwhelming at times. My mother is 98. She live on her own. I think she needs more help. She refuses to allow it. It is such a worry. I know for sure that I won't do this to my children. If I live alone in my house, and if I live as long as my mother has (doubtful), I will make sure I have caretakers that help the burden for the family. My mother is fully aware, but her body is just now beginning to keep her more and more in her chair. That is such a worry. Especially when she lives six hours away.

    I am curious about where you would relocate. I too would want a place that would not require upkeep and a lot of maintenance. That is another thing that is worrying me about my mother. The house needs more work than she realizes.

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  11. I have an acquaintance who lived and died at home - she was 103 and still had her wits about her, though the last year she had full-time help. Would you think of moving from VT? CO is such a harsh climate sometimes, but we still love it here. But alone - I just don't know.

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  12. GOOD FOR YOU! Some want to age in place, while their house crumbles around them. Much better to let young people enjoy the home!

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  13. It seems like a lot of work to move but if that's what keeps you happy then I say go for it. Getting along after 80 is becoming more common. Sadly it is my vision that is going to limit my affairs before the brain thing.

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